Life and Times of Multidimensional Ninja
by prologuebells
Summary: So a bunch of Naruto characters fall into my house. Whoop, there goes my life. Calamities ensue, crime happens, pop culture is ruined, and I never get to eat my cheese toasty. (Possibly a romance.)
1. Tobi, You Fucking Cretin

(Prologue)

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><p>It wasn't curiosity that brought Deidara and Tobi to this place. No, rather it was something much more incomprehensible. What brought them here was ancient, a magnetic pull that manifested when exposed to chakra. When taking this into consideration, it's not surprising that the later events played out as they did. See, it all started on a simple reconnaissance mission to the Land of Fire. Deidara had been following a map of the Fire country only generally, and Tobi had no fucks to give about anything at all, so really it was no shock when they found themselves surrounded by dense forest in the middle of who-knows-where. They were lost.<p>

"Where the hell are we, un? The map should have led us straight to the main road," Deidara complained, startling some nearby birds.

"Don't ask Tobi, Deidara-senpai, I was following you,"

"Yeah, well maybe if you hadn't- what's that?" Deidara had spotted a large wooden structure with a mask hanging on it. The mask was plain white, unadorned but for the kanji painted on its forehead.

"It looks like some kind of statue," Tobi said in a hushed voice.

"Why are you talking like that? And what kind of statue has a mask saying 'chaos' on it?" Deidara asked, looking towards the thing warily. "I'm getting a weird feeling from this thing, let's just find the track," He said, backing away slightly.

"It's just a mask Deidara-senpai," Tobi replied walking towards it. "What's there to be scared of?"

"I'm not scared! I just- wait Tobi I don't think you should….." Deidara trailed off as Tobi reached to pull the mask off the wooden statue. "Tobi, c'mon, stop, we've gotta get back to the mission!" Deidara was really nervous now.

"See Deidara-senpai- ," Tobi was cut off just as his gloved fingers curled around the edge of the porcelain object, and it started to vibrate. He pulled back, but his fingertips caught its edge and yanked it unceremoniously off the structure. For a moment nothing happened, and Tobi bent to pick it up off the ground.

"NO TOBI DON'T!" Was all Deidara got out before an all-enveloping brightness spread over the general vicinity, sucking in all chakra-bearing life forms unfortunate enough to be nearby.

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><p>It was a rather unfortunate coincidence that four of the nearby chakra-bearing life forms were Leaf Shinobi. A hastily-assembled team containing Tenten, Neji, Hinata, and Kakashi had been sent out on a short mission to scour Fire Country after the Hokage had been tipped off that Akatsuki were in the land. And due to the shortage of competent shinobi, the four of them had been put together for lack of anyone else available. Despite that, they worked well together, probably because none of them felt a constant need to be recognized or prove their skill (like <em>many<em> others, not pointing out names or anything.) and actually didn't mind working together.

"Kakashi-sensei, I really don't think there is much point in going after this lead," Tenten said as the team jumped through the dense tree growth.

"I agree with Tenten. The evidence your contact provided us with doesn't seem very reliable," Neji added.

"My contact has never led me wrong in the past. Besides, we have no other leads to follow." Kakashi murmured, frowning and coming to a halt. "Can you three feel that?"

"Feel what?" Tenten inquired as Neji and Hinata nodded.

"It feels….poisonous," Hinata said wonderingly.

"We should-," Kakashi's sentence was cut short as a blinding light beamed out from the East. "What the-," Kakashi was cut off again as the light enveloped them, and they knew no more.

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><p>As it happens, Team Hebi was also affected. Though, only <em>half<em> of Team Hebi, really. The quartet had been meandering (well, not Sasuke. He was _advancing _because he was a bit of a prick back then, and he didn't _meander_, he had no time for that.) across Grass Country, in a location that just so happened to be close to another statue with a mask on it. Another of those damned things, and they just so happen to be linked up, so when one gets set off, the others do as well.

"ALRIGHT SUIGETSU YOU SAY ONE MORE WORD AND I SWEAR I'LL- ," "You'll what, Karin? Creep me to death?" "WHY YOU LITTLE-I'M NOT THE ONE WHO CREEPED IN THE LADIES CHANGING ROOMS!" "HEY THAT WAS A COMPLETE ACCIDENT AND I'M NOT THE ONE WHO- ,"

"Um, guys?"

"-YOU OBNOXIOUS MORON- ,"

"_Hey, stop fighting and look at this!_"

"-WAS ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT- ,"

"Suigetsu. Karin." Sasuke's words call their argument to a halt.

"Yes Sasuke?" Karin purred.

"That." He said simply, pointing towards a strange glowing object in the distance.

"What about it?" Suigetsu asked.

"There's….it feels really…." Before Juugo could finish his sentence, a luminescence swept over them.

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><p>The last three that were affected were Hidan, Konan, and Itachi. Each of these people was also near a statue – a 'checkpoint'. Hidan was in Suna, and was contemplating the destruction he had taken part in earlier that day while Kakazu collected the bounty of who-the-fuck-cares. It was another case of strange object, weird feeling, consuming light, and Hidan was gone.<p>

Itachi and Kisame were reporting back to 'Leader-sama' and Konan when their incident happened. Kisame was replenishing supplies while Itachi talked to Pein, who had gone to collect some papers leaving Konan and Itachi alone in his office. The natural silence hovering in the room as they waited was broken by a low humming. Snapping to attention, the pair found the source of noise to be an unsuspicious ornamental mask hanging on the wall. Just as they moved into defensive positions, the mask seem to burst into brilliant, blinding light, and when Pein returned with the papers, his office was empty, and the mask hung on the wall, unobtrusive and innocuous.

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><p><strong>This is my first story on , so please be kind!<strong>

**Leave a review if you have any questions, and the plot can be affected.**


	2. Understandable Discombobulation

As chaos began to take effect in the narutoverse, a similar energy was reverberating in another 'verse. And in this 'other' verse, there was a being that was about to have their life thrown into turmoil. This would by no means be because of some predetermined fate, or karma, just mere circumstance. Just mere shitty, god-awful, defective circumstance.

This being we speak of is named Valeria, after her half-Italian grandmother, is about twenty years old, and has blonde hair and slate blue eyes. And she had recently purchased an item while browsing through a junk-shop. This item was a mask, plain white, with a kanji on its forehead. Valeria had placed this mask carelessly onto her messy desk, to be hung up at a later date. As she went through her usually nightly activities, and laid down to sleep, she gave no thought to the mask reading 'chaos'. She should've known better.

The hour was nearing one a.m when the mask started to glow. The girl slept, blissfully unaware as the glowing object began to vibrate. However, she _did_ stir when it burst out into blinding brilliance, and a massive…..a massive…..hole? void? came into existence, and 11 very strange looking, but very unconscious bodies came through to land on the wooden floor of her residence.

"Huh?" Was her eloquent response to the situation. Bleary eyed, she fumbled for her phone, and pressing a button she shone artificial light over the area around her bed. With that, she saw there was indeed a mass of bodies scattered around her still form. She blinked. She pinched herself. She closed her eyes and reopened them. She promptly fell back to her mattress, and went to sleep.

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><p>An hour and twelve minutes later, an understandably discombobulated Hinata Hyuuga woke to find herself in a very strange room, situated next to one Itachi Uchiha, who was starting to stir. With widening eyes, Hinata scrambled to provide distance between them, mouth opening to shriek in a very un-shinobi like fashion. But before she could go through with this, a hand shot up and covered her mouth, another pushing her shoulders back to the floor. Itachi hovered over her, and pressed a finger to his lips, signaling her to stay quiet. Composing herself and nodding, Hinata sat up as he released her, and looked around the premises. Between shooting wary glances at Itachi (who was also very confused, and looking around) she surveyed the room.<p>

It was rather large – it had what seemed to be a kitchen area at one end, a bookshelf and a door along one wall, a small piano and several windows across another, with a desk situated in the empty space between them. The desk was covered in papers, stationary, and various other artifacts, and surrounded by piles of books and more objects. The only other things in the space were the rather large set of drawers and the bed, which was really just a mattress, lying in the corner at the opposite end to the kitchen. There was another door along the wall from it, but that was all. What Hinata also noticed was the prone bodies lying around her and Itachi. Hinata frowned silently when she saw Kakashi, Neji, and Tenten, but didn't move, looking to Itachi instead.

Itachi was utterly and completely lost. Which was a little strange for the Uchiha genius, but really, who could make any sense of what was happening. The weird feeling, the bright light, the strange room, the seemingly random selection of ninja around him-who had nothing in common, as far as he could tell, and he doubted most of them had even met. He was rushing through various theories when he saw the white-eyed girl looking at him. _Hinata Hyuuga?_ He guessed, remembering her as being heir to the Hyuuga clan.

The silence stretched between them.

Just as he opened his mouth to speak, another form twitched. With a slight wriggle, and a stretch, Karin Uzumaki sat up and stared around, settling her now dumbfounded gaze to flicker between Hinata and Itachi.

More silence.

"Uhh…..where….what…is going on?" Karin stuttered out in disjointed words.

Hinata paused before saying "I'm not r-really sure. A-all I remember was a.…a light, and a strange feeling,"

"I recall the same, but there was a strange mask that produced it," Itachi said, curious about Hinata's similar experience.

"That's what happened to me! But-where are we now?" Karin asked, relieved she wasn't the only one completely lost.

They sat in collective confusion for a moment, before they sprung to awareness as another person stirred. This time it was a man. He had silver hair, and was bare from the waist up. As he moved to sit, he noticed his surroundings, and opened his mouth.

Itachi braced himself.

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><p><strong>This chapter is kinda boring – just a short establishing chapter to set things up. Next chapter is where things will pick up.<strong>

**I also realized i've fucked up the timeline - Hidan was incapacitated by the time Team Hebi was formed, but for the purposes of the story he's not and it's fanfiction, so who cares.**


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